Saturday, January 8, 2011

Once I was a runner

I was what most people call and "chubby" child. That soon changed into a fat kid. I hated being fat, hated it. I used to dream about what it would be like to be one of those girls that was born to be thin.

When I was 14 I started to lose weight and exercise. By the time I was 16 I had lost 50 lbs and was slim. I didn't think I was, but by the pictures I can tell you I was. Being overweight most of my life had made me shy about my appearance and my body, something that haunts me to this day.

I lost the weight eating a strict low fat diet and running. Running every morning before sun up. Before anyone could see me. And I loved it.

The rest of my teens and my twenties I maintaned a very healthy happy athletic weight and was very happy with it. But once in my thirties when my first marriage was in sad shape and my husband was already cheating on me. I ate. I ate to stuff down the knowlege of what I knew to be true, but that he wouldn't admit. I have to tell you, if you are ever in a relationship and you are the cheater, please know, that cheating is wrong, but lying about it takes it to a completely different level of abuse.

Ok, back on topic. So I gained weight, I was fat again. And I stayed at the same fat weight for 5 years. And than one day I decided I didn't want that for me anymore.

Actually what I decided was that I wanted a life for myself. I was raising two step sons that did not appreciate or respect me and was married to an abusive cheater that I was afraid of. I knew that I was at a point that if I didn't make changes for me, I would be lost. Be aware that this was a whole 3 years before I had the courage to end my marriage.

I changed my diet, reduced my portions, went to the gym, started back to cycling. And over time my weight dropped regularly. And I am proud to say I am back to my same weight as when I was 21 and happier for it.

But the running. I couldn't run anymore. Oh I could push myself through the pain of the first mile, but after that my knee would lock up and I was more of a hobble with speed.

Lots of doctor appointments followed by physical therapy. All to discover that there wasn't anything wrong with my knee except for naturally hyper extending joints. Good grief, really, all that for that???

So I cycle, swim and workout at the gym. But I miss the running.

A friend of mine told me of a training plan...Couch to 5k..google it, I'm in the groove and don't want to set up the link.

Now I wasn't on the couch. But I think this might do it. It's a plan to build yourself up to the run.

It starts with a 5 minute walk, and than 20 minutes of alternating running with walking, with the interval times changing each week over 9 weeks.

Wish me luck, so far on week 2, my knee isn't hurting and I am loving it. I love the feeling of tired legs. Just like I love the feeling of salt on my skin in the summer after a long hard ride.

Once I was a runner, and hopefully I will be again.

1 comment:

  1. You're singing my song. I was just telling a friend that I would like to get back into running after a year-and-a-half hiatus. But, it's daunting. I always want to re-start where I left off and when I can't, I often just don't re-start.

    Someone recently told me about the couch-to-5k as well. Although I'm not on the couch either (oh how I miss my couch time!), it may be a good way to re-start without my self-inflicted pressure.

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