Friday, June 3, 2011

Forgiveness ala Elizabeth Smart

Surprisingly so "People" magazine had a nice small article on Elizabeth Smart and her forgiveness of the two monsters that kidnapped her. I'm going to paraphrase, although it is very close to a quote.

Elizabeth said that she has forgiven him but that doesn't mean she's going to hang out with him or write him supporting letters.

I love this statement. Her description of forgiveness is right on. So many people confuse forgiveness with acceptance, they are very different things.

I have forgiven the whore monger that I was married to. That doesn't mean I accept that there was any excuse for his actions, nor does it mean that I want him anywhere in my life. My forgiveness of his hurtful actions mean that he isn't allowed to harm me anymore with the choices he made.

It's like putting a computer virus in a "quarantine". It's away from your OS, it can't trip up your PC, but it's never allowed back into the fold.

Don't look down at someone because they haven't outwardly embraced an individual that hurt them, that doesn't mean they haven't done the internal work to forgive them, it just means the door is shut.

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